Blank page, flights, airports…

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Betsy and I are returning to Angola after having the honor and privilege of participating in the wedding of our son, Luke, with Rachel Gaunce. It was a beautiful event and it was a joy to be present with others who are grateful for them and for this new beginning in their relationship.

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Our dear friends, Jordan Yarbrough, Dr Vianne and our Cavango staff sacrificially honored us with the extravagant gift of freeing us to be absent from Cavango for a couple weeks to be a part of this beautiful event. Jordan, Vianne and our staff knew they would be stretched physically and psychologically and they were. They were overwhelmed with many complicated and challenging cases and endured the trauma of daily facing so many arrivals and illnesses with both life and death outcomes. We have returned to the same, to a population of people who have no one who will give away their lives and their own pursuit of  “happiness” to care for them. 

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We have been so honored and loved during this trip, through many embraces and words of encouragement. We return with my brother, Dan, and our sister-in-law, Tina – family and dear friends for many years…

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Yesterday, Dan, Tina, Betsy and our staff hung over 1000 photos of staff and patients in our hospital hall.  Most had never seen themselves in photos.  The halls were packed with people looking at the photos, animatedly remembering the patients and enjoying seeing themselves in photos.  One of our mottos here is that this whole work is about the people, those who serve and those served.  These photos will be a permanent memorial of our motto, and we will add more photos over time… to honor those served and those who serve…

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Beauty and the beholder…

As you know, over these past couple years, while this work of cooperation and collaboration with so many people from around the world has flourished and grown, saving thousands of lives in the African Bush while proclaiming a living Jesus in every interaction, we have encountered people in our family, colleagues in ministry and others, who have chosen to directly or indirectly dishonor, mock, and/or abandon, us, our relationship and/or our work.  This dynamic continued on our trip home while we were, at the same time, the recipients of so much gratitude and support from those who know us best.  During this season of our lives, we have encountered the extremes of bitter and sweet…

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I share these thoughts because I know that many of you face the same.  Selfless caring requires courage because rejection of one’s care happens all the time.  We know, also, of course, that Jesus faced similar treatment and that He said His followers would face the same. By those for whom He cared, Jesus was called a drunkard, a liar, a thief, a blasphemer, a rebel, hypocrite, and so much more while, at the same time, He was also received with gratitude and worship and called Messiah, Lord, Master, etc. His own brother rejected Him and later died a martyr testifying to others about the “ridiculous” and verified claims of His brother…  

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“As Jesus was speaking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. Someone told Jesus, “Your mother and your brothers are outside, and they want to speak to you.”   Jesus asked, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then he pointed to his disciples and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers. Anyone who does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother!”

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Who did the One we follow consider His “family”?

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As with Jesus, our concept of family has broadened greatly through our long cross-cultural journey and we now dearly love so many on “the other side of the world” who are not “related” to us.  Our Angolan family… is comprised of so many beautiful people – young and old, who speak various languages, and who are from radically different cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds – who we have chosen to cherish, and who have chosen to cherish, appreciate and respect us and our care.

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We must choose…  With whom will we devote our time and energy?  Who will we seek to please?  To which cross is our Father leading us, for another’s benefit? Who will we choose to serve?  Are we striving to pick ripe (receptive) or unripe fruit?  Do we fret over the one who rejects us more than we rejoice over another’s favor?  Are we digging for water in a dry or wet river bed?  Are we scattering seed on unprepared or “ready” soils?  Meditating on these questions can be challenging… and transforming…

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Paul spoke of his relationship with Timothy.  Might we reconsider who we have chosen to be our “Paul” – the person we emulate, study and imitate; and our Timothy, in whom we recognize humility and passion for Jesus and who will receive from us and in whom we will, therefore, choose to invest our time and effort…

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In Cavango we have Paul(s) and Timothy(s), brothers/sisters/sons/daughters who are family according to Jesus…

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“Who is my son or my daughter, my brother or my sister?”  In whom will I choose to invest?  Those grateful, passionate and hungry to learn from me? Or will I invest my time and effort in those who have all the answers, who reject my care and counsel, and who proudly worship worthless, imagined, attractive, modern cultural gods/masters/philosophies? 

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So many you, and Jesus-lovers throughout history, have faced these challenges. We must respond with wisdom and grace but we must also be wise to invest and give our lives and effort where the soil demonstrates receptivity to the seeds we scatter and to how/where we scatter.  In this age of social media and celebrity worship, the old adage of “consider the source” has been abandoned.  We must wisely evaluate the fruit and lives of those we listen to, follow and lead.

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Those who criticize, mock and berate us and only seek to argue our beliefs/perspectives are not worthy of our effort. We must love them, but love is not trust and to love and to invest are not the same.  We are called to love freely and to invest wisely, counting costs.  Our Father will faithfully continue to pursue them as He did us when we were blinded (we’ve all been there).  Sometimes separation from those unwilling to embrace us is wise, blood relation or not, no matter how much we care for them…

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Those who honestly and humbly explore with us that which we together seek – the Way, the Truth and the Life – are our family. 

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What distinguishes a Jesus-follower from another?  Gratitude… one who gives his life to Jesus and surrenders to Him. In gratitude, he/she forsakes his/her life/dreams/perspectives/ambitions to Jesus. He/she is captured by Jesus, His words, His teaching, His emphases, His worldview, His ways. Another might be enamored by Jesus and might be curious, but remains independent of Him. One seeks Jesus and His Kingdom firstly, while another includes Jesus in his own kingdom, his own dreams, his own pursuits.  The chasm between the two is wide and the difference great, but both can appear quite similar from the outside. We must not judge (close the book), but we must choose wisely…

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Following…  In whom did the One we claim to follow invest?  Let us do the same.  How did Jesus spend His time?  Let us do the same.  How did He speak?   Let us do the same.  How did He live?  What did He emphasize?  Let us do the same.  Who did Jesus consider His family?  Let us do the same…

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We are called to love those to whom we are related, chosen by our Father.  Jesus demonstrated that family is a gift and must be cherished. He also said we must give ourselves away to the son, daughter, grandson of another, because they are of equal value.  We have been granted, with honor, complete freedom to make our own choices involving who to hear, to love, and to follow.  To invest in those uninterested in relationship with us, whether they are related to us or not, is unwise.  When Jesus spoke of pearls and swine, He was not speaking of pearls and/or swine…

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We all know that love, according to Jesus, is not sentiment, it always involves cost, and there is no love without freedom…  We are adopted into Jesus’ family by invitation.  Relationship with us must also be by invitation and without obligation. Freedom must also be honored in whom we invest, whether in Cavango or at home.  In Cavango, as at home, there are those in whom we have invested heavily and it is some of these who have turned on us.  They are free to do so, but we must consider this when we choose in whom we continue to invest and we must, at times, be wise enough to walk away.

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We have sons and daughters at home and in Cavango. Many dearly loved grandkids, brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers…. These cherish us, and we, them, and they are grateful for us and honor us, in contrast to those few others. 

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One of the saddest characteristics of the current modern generations (including my own) is that independence and rebellion against virtually anything from the past, doing something new and the pursuit of self-gratification and personal “happiness” are given more value than addressing, as Jesus did, and as He calls us to do, the pain and tragedy that occur daily around us and throughout the world.  Those whose chosen master is “me” serve their personal inclinations, imagined and/or real.  Jesus indicated that our inclinations, emotions and “feelings” are potential sources of deception and destruction and must serve us, rather than vice versa.  Our “natural” inclinations, attractions and emotions must be surrendered to our chosen master.  When we follow Jesus, our tendencies and desires, whether we came by them via “nature” or “nurture,” become subject to His will and ways (“Not my will, but your will be done…”). 

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You are injured and must travel for help through a dangerous swamp that contains many pockets of quicksand as well as insects, reptiles, and other creatures that can further harm you.  You may choose a guide.  Your choices are as follows: a) one newly arrived, promoting much knowledge in swamp survival, carrying the latest technology for navigating the swamp, b) one young, attractive, fashionable, well-spoken, and who loves music and is clearly fun to be around, c) one sober, “weathered” and boring with gray hair, a limp and an ancient manual who has lived in the swamp for years, d) one without experience but quite enthusiastic and confident in her ability to lead, who seems to care for you and she guarantees your safe passage, e) one who is quite convincing that the dangers are exaggerated and that the crossing requires little thought or preparation, and f) none; you are confident in your knowledge and abilities and, based on how you “feel”, you do not need a guide… 

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We are all guides, also, called to help and to serve those hurting and trying to navigate life’s “swamp”.  Who will we choose as our travel companions, those we will help and serve as we cross the swamp?   In whom will we invest our talents and our hard-earned counsel and knowledge?

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Now a couple days later… out of hundreds treated over several weeks, we have had seven deaths in this past week.  A beautiful woman with HIV, a woman with heart failure and three babies with malaria whose parents waited too long to seek help, a baby dying of liver failure because of herbal “treatment” from a shaman, a young man with severe TB…  So much grief experienced by all of the family and friends involved…  I just returned from the hospital at 2a to a baby with severe croup, a man with severe TB, from whom we drained a liter of fluid twice from his chest, a one-week-old baby who died of severe pneumonia, and a man unable to breathe, with severe heart failure, who stopped taking his meds at home because he had improved…  Our faithful local staff met me at the door.  All awake, all tired, all concerned and needing help…  So many need help and so few respond to His call to “go” or to support those who go…

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One of the most beautiful characteristics of Jesus’ kingdom is redemption and change of course.  There isn’t an error, sin or choice that can’t be redeemed by our Father – ashes to beauty.  Every single story in the bible, over thousands of years, is consistently of error-prone, flawed, hard-hearted people whose poor choices have been redeemed by a gracious, beautiful Father…  Every rebel can turn…

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It is this great cloud of witnesses of which we are an a small part.  We are our Father’s agents of redemption.  This requires giving our lives, as did they, if we accept the task.  We, and they, will watch as our Father redeems, over time, every single criticism and betrayal which has been a part of our last few years…  Those who have died have met our Father face-to-face.  Did He know them and they, Him?  Will we labor, every day, to make sure everyone has the opportunity to know Him, His unearned favor, His radical beauty?

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Paul’s letter to the Philippians…. written from prison after betrayal and abandonment…